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You probably know by now that the number of words you say to your child really matters. The more you talk to your child, the better.
Well… yes, and more.
It turns out, it also matters how you are talking to your child. You should be targeting specific grammar forms, repeating certain words / phrases over and over again, and making sure that your child is paying attention to you when you talk.
That’s the language portion.
But what about the sound of your talking? What about your voice?
Yes, the way you sound plays a big role in how effective your taking is.
Babies really respond to their mother’s voice. And, they respond to their dad’s voice in major ways too – although research suggests that happens just a bit later.
At any rate. This means, babies and toddlers notice voices, and the overall affect of someone’s speech.
And certain ways of talking are more baby friendly than others.
The way a parent sounds when playing or talking with a child is so important. It is his / her “vocal affect” or their overall sound. And making this as good as it can be can make baby talk as effective as possible.
Without further ado, here are some speech tips - not for kids, but for parents and caregivers :)
1. Raise that pitch
Studies have shown that babies respond more to high-pitched voices. Scientists have speculated about why this is. There are some theories that high-pitched talk sounds more like what the baby sounds like, and thus prepares the baby to hear his own voice.
So, next time you talk to your baby, try to get the pitch of your own voice to match his. Yes, you might sound like that one babying great aunt in your childhood you weren’t too fond of. But the increased responsiveness in your child is worth it.
2. Turn the volume up... some
Parents may be diligent about talking to children. They may do all their speech homework and more.
But they may be talking softly. They might murmur to their babies like they murmured to themselves while doing chores.
But remember. Your baby has to pay attention to you. This means that your voice has to be attention-grabbing. If you talk like you are reading aloud a recipe book, your child will not catch, and register, your voice.
Bring the volume up – at the level it would be if you were talking to the person next to you at the dinner table. Just because you are doing a lot of talking, don’t let the volume go down.
Of course, use common sense. Much has been written about a baby’s sensitivity to sound. So you want to make sure you are not startling or overstimulating your baby. No shouting! And you can vary your volume across the day. You can get quieter around nap or bed time, and be at maximum stimulation at, say, the park.
Record yourself playing with your child, then play it back. Do you sound nice and clear? Or is your voice not loud enough to stand out from the radio jingling in the background?
Which brings us to our next tip...
3. Turn other volume down
Make sure that when you are talking, you are not competing for your baby’s attention. Turn down the background music. Make sure there is no TV blaring in the background (for more than one reason!)
And, if you have more than one child, make sure that you are scheduling some one-on-one talking time. You can schedule this when another child is in school, or when the other child is sleeping. It’s hard to be heard, after all, in the middle of screaming and crying.
4. Get excited
Your child loves peek a boo because she does not understand a cognitive concept known as “object permanence.”
But she also loves it because it’s exciting! “Peek a…” is nice and soft. Then “Boo!” is full of enthusiasm and fun.
Children respond to “high affect” – big gasps, dramatic sighs, startling noises, big laughs. This exaggerated intonation helps children learn to speak, by keeping their attention long enough to register and process what you are saying.
5. Praise Talk
A lot has been said about praising children… and not all of it is positive. Parents worry that praising children will teach them to expect praise for everything, and spoil them.
But praise is a very positive force in a little one’s life – as long as it is targeted, and has a specific purpose.
And, praising your child’s words and phrases is a very specific target. So when your toddler communicates in a new way – encourage it! If they are using more language, they need to know it is a good thing.
So, talk to a baby and be extremely positive when they talk back. Make sure even your voice is conveying approval when you say things like…
“look at you talking!” or “I love how you said ‘ball’. ‘My ball!”
Babies and toddlers love praise. You can see it in their eyes and their smiles. They will be motivated to talk more so they can hear your approving, loving tone.
6. Sound SIMPLE
We’re moving from general voice tips to specifics about how you sound. And an important part of how you sound is whether your speech is simple or complex.
Simple is better.
Think about it : if you are saying a 11 word sentence like “Do you want to eat a hot sandwich tomorrow for breakfast?” to a 2 year old, he is not going to process, and understand, the whole thing.
He will hear “sandwich” and “tomorrow”, if he has great attention, maybe.
To make your words more effective, try to adjust your sentences. The number of words in a sentence should approximately equal the child’s age. This is based very loosely on the number of morphemes or word parts children say per sentence as they grow.
For a two year old, try to keep your talk to “Let’s sit?” or “We’ll go there?” or “He’s driving.”
For a five year old, you can progress to things like “Let’s go to the park,” or “Mommy’s car is not here,” and expect your child to follow.
An important note - you do not need to “dumb down” your talk. No “you car” or “car fall” or related caveman speak.
You just have to make sure that the length is appropriate to your child’s processing speed.
If you sound simple, your child is more likely to tune in.
7. SLOW DOWN
Your baby is still young, and her processing speed is developing. Try to slow down when you talk to her so she can take in everything you are saying.
An added bonus: when you talk to your child slowly, you are setting a foundation for fluent speech. Many children experience disfluencies or “preschool stuttering” as they age. Talking slowly is a great way of making speech a smoother, easier experience.
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You made it! You now know the 7 ways to optimize what your baby hears every day.
Happy (and effective!) talking!
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Disclaimer : Smarter Speech is a pediatric speech therapy / speech-language pathology practice for toddlers and children providing in-home and teletherapy services in and around Mountain View, CA and Los Gatos, CA. Smarter Speech Blog aims to provide free speech and language tips for parents educators and therapists. However, this post is not providing speech-language pathology services. This is general information, not speech -language pathology or speech therapy. This article does not assume or create a client – SLP relationship. The author is not liable for any losses or damages due to actions or failure to act based on the content in this article. If you need assistance with a child’s speech or language needs, please contact a speech-language pathologist in your area.
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